Sep 16, 2020

The Gifts of Imperfection


This year marks the 10 year anniversary of Brené Brown’s book The Gifts of Imperfection. I know that she is most well-known for Daring Greatly, but for me this book was more transformational. 

Maybe it was because of my attachment to perfectionism and my fear of being vulnerable and fucking up. 

In her research she set out to understand what it meant to live a Wholehearted life. 

“Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging.” (p. 1)

Now, I don’t know about you, but to me that sounds like a way of life I would like to lead. And add to it that I also see where in my life I have work to do and consistently commit to that work so that I can disrupt the ways I’ve been indoctrinated into systems that separate and oppress. 

Living a Wholehearted life means letting go of the need to do things perfectly, to be right, or to know everything (all symptoms of White Supremacy BTW). To vulnerable enough to do the messy work of untangling oneself from the biases, prejudices and beliefs that are harmful to all of us. 

This requires a balance between self-care and collective care. It requires digging deep and it requires sitting back and taking a time out. 

There are definitely times in our life when we need to just ‘dig deep’ and push through. Because kids need to be fed, work needs to get done, etc. The world doesn’t just stop when we are bone tired. It’s those times when it feels like there is too much to do and no time for self-care. 

One of the things that Brené found in her research (p. 4) was that people who live wholeheartedly do DIG Deep. But, they don’t just push through. They DIG Deep a bit differently. When they are bone tired, overwhelmed and exhausted they get:

  • Deliberate in their thoughts and behaviors through prayer, meditation, or simply setting their intentions
  • Inspired to make new and different choices
  • Going. They take action. 

It’s not the old pattern of pushing through and powering ahead. It’s not about forcing oneself to get started or to be productive. Instead it is an invitation to prayerfully, intentionally and thoughtfully do something restorative. 

Consider how can you get deliberate and inspired about your daily choices and habits? What is working right now? What isn't? Stay curious. Stay open.

How can you take action right now?

Join us for the upcoming Align & Awaken™ Habits of Resilience 10-Week Program!! It's a community of individuals coming together with the intention of living a Wholehearted life. We focus on getting realigned with our core values, realigned with the rhythms of nature, realigned with the Self. This opens us up so so many possibilities. More space, more expansion, more connection, more ease. Click here to get registered.



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