Apr 7, 2020

It's ok to rest

its-ok-to-rest

Week four of shelter in place here in California. Week five for me because I was sick and chose to self-quarantine early.

Honestly, I am tired. Really tired. I am sad. Really sad. Feeling all the emotions and ups and downs. 

This is real. We don’t know when or how it will end. This creates dis-ease. This creates discomfort.

I am also grateful. Grateful for a roof over my head. Grateful that my family is safe. Grateful that my family still has work. Grateful for the communities that I am a part of. Grateful for the practices that keep me connected to who I am and to source. I recognize the myriad of privileges that I have. I am grateful.

And I am still tired. I know that living in the stress response is exhausting. I know that being stuck "on" is depleting. I am using my tools and resources to self-regulate and trying to stay positive and all the things. 

And...like so many of you I am a parent. A parent trying to be present to my four and a half year old (24/7 without a break) while still attempting to work on my business. A mother trying to keep her quiet during my husband’s conference calls. A mother trying to keep some semblance of a routine for her. Each day trying to get her to do her school work (she’s in preschool so not too much pressure there). And there is guilt. Too much screen time. Check. Too much sugar. Check. Not following through with consistent parenting. Check. Caving when there is a meltdown. Check. 

Perhaps you can relate.

Take a slow breath in. Let it go. Do that again. 

Let your shoulders soften. Move your head gently. Open and close your mouth to loosen your jaw.

Notice.

Last night while on a call with one of the communities I am part of we asked a simple question. Where are you finding rest?

I almost collapsed with relief when the question was asked. And the tears came. Release came. I found it to be the most compassionate question I had been asked in recent weeks. 

Rest. None of us needs permission to rest. We are in the midst of a pandemic. It’s OK to rest. 

I know this on an intellectual level. But productivity is in my DNA. As is true for so many of us in this culture I have been indoctrinated with the belief that I must always be productive, always achieve, always be DOING. And this culture of productivity is killing us. It has been killing us slowly for years. Now that we are in this moment may we see how much this is harming our bodies (physical, mental/emotional, and spiritual).

We are witnessing this deeply rooted cultural belief that productivity should always be our top priority through the persistant marketing right now all around us.

"What better time to learn how to do this and that?"

"To create the business you've always wanted to create."

"Try the new workout you've always wanted to try...from the comfort of your own home."

The messages are everywhere. How are you being productive with all of this new free time? 

On a side note...a lot of people do not have more free time. Many people are working overtime. Many people are trying to be full time parents, homeschooling their kids...while still being expected to work as usual. 

But what if collectively we choose to rest instead? To just stop. To pause and reassess the ways we were living before this moment? And choose a new normal? A way of living that incorporates rest before we burn out?  

And so I ask you, how are you finding rest in this moment? What does rest look like for you? 

Surrender. Trust. Listen to the deep wisdom of your body and rest. 


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